Count Your Reasons

Since this Sunday is Father’s Day, I hope you will allow me the opportunity to indulge in a bit of “doting”. Usually one pays tribute to one’s father on this day and I could easily fill a column doing that. But I would like to reflect just a bit on those eight wonderful little lives that God has generated into being through the life-giving love of my wife and I, and who have been temporarily entrusted to my earthly care in my role as their father.

First, there is Timothy Dominic. He’s 14. There’s just something special about your firstborn. And Timmy is certainly special as well as responsible, easy going, and even-tempered. He has a warm, shy, sort of smile and makes a friend out of everyone he meets. Everyone likes Timmy. Tim also has a natural ability to take everything in stride, which is important, when you’re the eldest of eight (and soon to be nine).

And then there’s Michelle Frances. She’s 12, and as tall and as beautiful as her mother. Michelle loves to read. And talk about creative! She’s always inventing something. Her latest and ongoing creation is a doll condominium, not just a dollhouse; but a whole condominium complex that she’s made out of cardboard boxes, complete with furniture, appliances, and swimming pools. Like Timmy she is also very responsible and sometimes makes dinner for the whole family when her mother is too tired.

There’s only one word for our next child, Christopher Damian, age 10, and that’s “relaxed”. Christopher seems to be on a permanent “lime” (a Caribbean expression for just “hangin’”). His easy smile and the slightly sleepy expression on his handsome face are disarming. He’s sort of naturally cool and his relaxed demeanor has the subliminal effect of making you wonder “why the rush?”

Our next child is Jessica Elizabeth, age 8. At first glance she seems to look like an average, happy 8-year-old. But something draws you back to her face and especially to her eyes, which are exotic beyond her years. Hidden behind the normal childish face with the half-missing teeth is a dangerous beauty and a reminder that I have but a few years yet to instill the morals to balance that power of attraction which she is sure to have.

And then there’s “Little Miss Mia”, Mia Nichole, age 6. A little elf of a girl with the most incredible smile framed by a rag-taggle of wildly beautiful hair. And talk... Wow, can she talk. The most fantastic, detailed stories of the day’s events you’ve ever heard...a barrage of words accompanied by exaggerated gestures, facial contortions and wild, bodily animations. Who needs TV when you have Mia?

The first thing you’ll notice about Dana Marie, age 5, is a uniquely beautiful face dominated by the largest eyes you’ve ever seen. If you’re a stranger it’ll take you a while to get her to smile. But it’s worth waiting for, for it’s a smile as big as her heart is soft. The first thing Dana does every morning is look for me. She’ll often find me in my office bent over my keyboard. Without a word she’ll climb up on my chair, wedge herself in behind me, and fall back asleep. “Dana-Shana” is definitely her daddy’s girl.

Now we come to Angelica, age 3. I call her “little bit” for she can sit her whole fragile, little frame in the palm of my hand. “Precious” is the only word I can use to describe this tiny little girl with the beautiful, faintly sad eyes and wispy soft hair. She’s such a joyful little thing who loves to cuddle, suck her thumb, and goes nowhere without her “blankie”.

At last (until November) there’s Michael Martin Rohr. It sounds big and he is big. At 23 months, he has already outgrown his 3-year-old sister and he lets her know it several times a day. We call him “shivellings” because the massive amounts of flesh on his muscular frame “shivel” (shake) when he walks. Actually “walks” is not the word, it’s more like “pounds”. “Mikey” is almost too handsome with his deep dark olive colored skin, soft, Adonis-like, curly, black hair, and a grin that seems to “know too much already”. Michael and I share an extra something special. We were born on the very same day, 42 years apart. What better birthday gift!

After our 4th child, my wife, Leone, was advised to start using birth control or to have something done permanently. Life was hard then and still is in many ways and nobody would have faulted her for following the doctor’s advice. But I thank God she chose to remain open to life for 4 obvious reasons: Mia, Dana, Angelica, and Michael. In November, I’ll have one more reason. Count your reasons...and have a happy Father’s Day.

Tim Rohr

June 18, 2000